LOL Contest from Bet Phoenix Casino - $1,000.00s Free!

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        • Started by
          Sr. Member
          402
        • last active 7 months ago

        Thanks for this post from:

        • Avatar 12170
        • Poker face funny
        • Avatar 20578
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        Hi Everyone,

        Bet Phoenix Casino

        This is a Deposit only contest exclusive for Latest Casino Bonuses members.

        The promotion is the following, make any deposit between now and August 25th and participate in the our amazing Joker contest.

        We have created a special bonus for this contest, although you don't have to use it to participate, any deposit, using any bonus, or no bonus, will quality:

        777% Reload Bonus - Usable up to 10x
        Min Deposit $35, max $300
        35x playthrough on deposit + Bonus
        Non-Cashable
        10x Max Cashout On Deposit
        Coupon: LCBCONTEST

        Now, the idea is that for every deposit you make, you get to post 1 joke on this thread. On August 25th I will come and choose the top 10 jokes. Of these, we will set up a poll so that the Latest Casino Bonuses member can decide which is the best joke!

        The winner will get a $777 Free Chip. Places 2-5 win $200. Position 6-10 $100. Everyone else will win a $35 free chip.

        When you post your joke, make sure your post your deposit date. You get 1 entry per deposit.
      • 20150122 113127
        • Replied by
          Super Hero
          1186
        • last active 16 hrs ago

        Thanks for this post from:

        • Avatar 17884
        Username: wanton
        Deposited July 28th

        Two campers are hiking in the ds when one is bitten on the rear by a rattlesnake. "I'll go into town for a doctor," the other says. The friend runs ten miles to a small town and finds the only doctor delivering a baby.
        "I can't leave," the doctor says. "But here's what to do. Take a knife, cut a little X where the bite is, suck out the poison and spit it on the ground."
        The guy runs back to his friend, who is in agony. "What did the doctor say?" the victim cries.
        "He says you're gonna die."
      • Avatar 19922
        • Replied by
          Hero Member
          731
        • last active 7 months ago
        username: colywog
        deposited: 7/27/10

        SIGNS YOU HAVE GAMBLING FEVER:

        1. You help your four-year-old learn math by teaching him to count cards
        2. When your addiction counselor says he thinks "the odds are good" that you will beat your gambling problem, you see it as a reason to immediately call your bookie
        3. You lose your wife in a poker game; you lose your mistress going double-or-nothing; and now they refuse to let you bet your hooker
        4.  You go to a hockey game and wonder what happened to the dealers and boxman.
        5.  When an ambulance passes with flashing lights, you assume someone hit a "hand pay."
        6. You go into a shoe store and ask if they have 4, 6, or 8 deck.
        7. When your English professor says the author made his point; you ask if he pressed or not.
        8. You hear the bible story where Lazarus is told to "Come out", and you ask for a 2-way C & E.
        9. You show up early at the bakery to take advantage of the hot rolls.
        10. You wonder if a salad shooter is really a gambling device.
        11. When the bartender asks if you want a "double", you say not against an ace.
        12. You go into a 7-11 and ask to play the "don't."
      • Avatar 24465
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          Super Hero
          1106
        • last active 2 months ago

        Thanks for this post from:

        • Avatar 19922
        HAHA colywog those are great.  Thanks Nicholas you are constantly bringing us contest and ways to earn free chips even when there is already another opportunity going.  No other casino comes close to treating it's players as good as BetPhoenix in my opinion.
      • Avatar 12170
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        • last active 3 hrs ago
        user name macendra
        deposited 7/27/10
        Two best girl friends played softball together their whole life. while sitting in their rocking chairs in the nursing home one day they asked each other if they thought there would be softball in Heaven.  the one lady died, leaving the second lady alone, and one day she hears: Ruth, ruth, it's me Helen. Helen, you died! Yes, I know but I have good news and bad news for you. What, what is it? Well the good news is there is softball in Heaven,but the bad news is Your pitching on Tuesday!
      • Avatar 12170
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          Hero Member
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        • last active 3 hrs ago
        user name macendra
        deposited 7/28/10

        What type of phone do prisoners use in jail?

        A ceil phone.
      • Avatar 14716
        • Replied by
          Sr. Member
          457
        • last active 16 days ago
        my username: csjequ
        dep. 29-07

        Lets play chicken
         

        This is a transcript of a real conversation between a U.S. naval ship and Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland:
        Canadians: Please change course to 15 degrees south to avoid collision.

        Americans: We recommend that you change course to 15 degrees north to avoid a collision.

        Canadians: Negative. They'll have to change course to 15 degrees south to avoid collision.

        Americans: This is the captain of a U.S. naval vessel. I repeat: change YOUR course.

        Canadians: No, I repeat. Change YOUR course.

        Americans: - THIS IS aircraft carrier USS LINCOLN, the second largest VESSEL IN THE AMERICAN ATLANTERHAVSFLÅDE. WE ARE dining with THREE DESTROYER, three cruisers and numerous HELP OTHER VESSELS. I demand that you change course to 15 degrees north, I repeat 15 degrees north. IF NOT DO VI TAKE OUR countermeasures to ensure our vessel safety.

        Canadians: - This is a lighthouse. Their answer?
      • Avatar 14716
        • Replied by
          Sr. Member
          457
        • last active 16 days ago
        username:csjequ
        28 july

        A small misunderstanding. . .
           

        A sailor comes up to the captain: "We have a stowaway with what we do with him?"
        "Throw him overboard as usual!"

        Sailor salute and go again. Soon after he comes back. "Captain! What should I do with his white cane? "
      • Avatar 1502
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          Hero Member
          543
        • last active 7 months ago
      • Avatar 17884
        • Replied by
          Mighty! Member
          3700
        • last active 6 months ago


        I don't get it either



        :-*
      • Avatar 12170
        • Replied by
          Hero Member
          904
        • last active 3 hrs ago
        mamrone wrote:

        user name macendra
        deposited 7/28/10

        What type of phone do prisoners use in jail?

        A ceil phone.



        oops as a good friend pointed out it's spelled CELL PHONE sorry.
      • Avatar 12170
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          Hero Member
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        • last active 3 hrs ago

        Thanks for this post from:

        • Avatar 17884
        • Poker face funny
        user name macendra
        deposited 7/29/10

        my granddaughter wanted me to post this one,
        why is six afraid of seven? cause seven, eight, nine.

        sorry guys but she's so cute, she was born 1lb4oz and shes eight now and perfectly normal, truly a miracle, so granma had to make her happy. but hey it is cute.
      • Avatar 17884
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          Mighty! Member
          3700
        • last active 6 months ago

        Thanks for this post from:

        • Avatar 12170
        ♥ it mamrone...give her a kiss for me



        :-*
      • Avatar 14716
        • Replied by
          Sr. Member
          457
        • last active 16 days ago
        huh! you dont get it, why?

        In Denmark blind people walks with a white cane, so everybody knows the cant see.

        "Blind" passenger on a ship, blind man with a white cane. The captain thought it was a "blind" passenger, but it was a real blind man.

        Did Google not translate it right since you didnt understand it?
      • Avatar 17884
        • Replied by
          Mighty! Member
          3700
        • last active 6 months ago
        Oh ok...I get it now..lol so sorry

        Good luck with the contest!


        :-*

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