How does your family feel about YOUR gambling?

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Last post made 13 years ago by wnanhee
tyesmommy
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  • So, I just got a call from my mom...she said my boyfriend (Tommy) called her last week to chat and had mentioned I was doing some online gambling.  He put some negative spin to it stating he'd like to start a savings account in her name so that we can put money in but not take it out, inorder to save towards our relocating back west and that I dont spend our savings gaming.  What he failed to mention:

    1) I only use money I have earned doing PT political research or prior winnings, not his our funds I consider "ours".

    2) I budget myself and NEVER go over what I've set to play.

    3) A portion of he $2,500 I won two months ago went towards car repairs (687$), an overdue electric bill (279$), clothes/toys/etc for OUR son, and $200+ on some xbox 360 crap for Tommy.

    4) I've managed to save more towards relocating than Tommy! Ugh!  >:(

    I guess Im pissed because my privacy has been somewhat violated, Tommy loves and reaps the benefits from my winnings but complains when I lose, and he should have openly discussed his "concerns" to me rather than my mother.

    There, I just needed to vent.
    I feel better now!  grin

    Does anyone else have family members/friends that are negative about your gambling?

  • This is a very sore subject with me, and I learned it's better if they don't know. I'm tired of hearing it from everyone. >:( Except my Mom...who goes to Atlantic City once a month!
    I tell people this:
    Some people like to play sports, others go to the movies, others go to bars, well I spend money on MY entertainment for the week. It's just what I like to do!

  • I have never shared with my family I actually deposit.  They are of the sort that it would be a foolish thing to do, and a waste of my money.  Yet some of the things they do with their money is so silly to me.

    I agree with acgofer, some people enjoy lots of things, I happen to like to gamble.

    All the other things people go and do cost money as well, and I feel that mine is no different.

    I too, set a budget, and never spend anything needed for other things in my life.

    Your in a situation tyesmommy that seems unfair.  He enjoys the  benefits of your wins, yet complains when you lose.  Losing is part of the game when you gamble.  Yet, you can win some awesome money too.

    I bet your not done talking to Tommy over this . hahahaha

    Best of luck to you....

                                                                          PMM

  • I look at it this way My Friends nor Family pay my bills so until then do what i do with my money is my business

  • Good post!  My husband tells me play whatever I want as long as our bills are paid each month!  I didn't start online gambling until I became a stay at home Mom in 02. Since then it has been a roller coaster.  I cannot budget to save my life.  I have given up online gambling more times than I can count.  I love it so much but it is hard for me to not do the whole "just one more time" thing.  

    I have gotten my family in some serious financial difficulties due to my online gambling. I don't even want to know how much I have spent over the years but I know it is probably more than a years worth of salary. sad

    Like I said before, I have given it up time and time again.  It just sucks not being able to be a normal person and play a game you love without going overboard.  I swear I am bi-polar.  I started gambling again around Dec of last year.  I do slip now and then but have done much much better about not going crazy with it.  I find myself cashing out smaller amounts 2-4 hundred just so I can use that money to finance my gambling.

    Does the rest of my family know?  NO!  They have bailed me out before and I am really trying to be responsible about it this time.  My whole family gambles!  My Mom goes to the land casinos all the time but she has the money!  She even won a brand new Jeep Patriot last year!  My Aunts also gamble online and at the land casinos.  I know they have gotten into the same situations I have.  One of my Aunts can't even have internet because she would be tempted so bad!  We pretty much don't talk about it and I think that is the best.  

    What sucks is when you are kicking butt on a machine and you have unexpected company and have to shut the casino down while they visit. lol

  • My husband doesn't like the fact that I gamble. He thinks it's a waste of money.

    I believe his 360 games are a waste of money..LOL

    So we go back and forth. I think as long as I don't spend a huge amount of money anymore, which I used to do, Im fine. I don't think there should be a problem, if I enjoy something that he doesn't. We will never meet eye to eye on this issue and I've come to accept that.

  • Oh gosh.. well i have 2 sorts of gambling, living in vegas machines are just about a block away, casinos are less then a mile and online is just a few clicks... in the past i have been talked to about gambling, as well as the gossip "thats all she does is gamble" (these are grown folks gossiping with their own addictions and problems that have come to me to for help). It can be embarressing especially when they upped the gossip anti, added a few extra spins, makes me feel like the ending of a bonus round with zero! If i'm not funding anything with their money, then it's none of theirs or anyones business, i agree it's my privacy, my thing.
    When you lose no ones there for you, when you win everyones there with their hands out.. so don't bite the hand that feeds you.
    I'm happy gambling and not one of them is going to bother me with what they say or do, i respect their opinions but as far as this is concerned, keep it to themselves. Its my money, i earned.

  • AGREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED

    nobodys business but mine!
    on a side note, if you really get into trouble, and other lives that you chose to be part of, like your relationship or more important your kids, an its the sort of trouble that will
    put less food on the table, i say then its not anymore just your business, but that of anyone in your environment that cares.
    kids are fed, bills ( the most important ones) are paid, NOW you can do what the hell you want with YOUR money tongue
    @ mommy, i'd be  a bit pissed too, i think tommy needs to take  a stand, and be square, either he supports the lot, or he will start complaining too when your winning!

  • Your boyfriend had no right to tell your mother. If there was and is something you want her to know then it should come from u, not him. Married or not he is supposed to your other half. 

    As far as my family, I come from a very RELIGOUS one. And of course gambling of any kind is unheard of. 

    Even though I've seen my family members and realatives spend more money on a perse or pair of shoes than I spend in a week.  smiley

    Everyone has their  " Vices ".........it's up to u as a person who u want to share them with.  And if one person has a drinking vice and the other gambling , who really is to say which one is ok? 

  • Gambling can be a very taboo word in some circles. The way i feel about it is there is always going to be something that someone is gonna consider taboo!

    The non smoker can't stand the smoker....the drinker can't stand the non drinker. The list is endless. We all have vices in life, its part of the human condition. Don't ever let anyone put you down for what someone considers to be wrong. I am sure there is things that are wrong in that person too.

    If your happy and your not destructive.........live your life the way you want to....one happy gambler!

    Lips
  • Thanks to everyone for all your outstanding resposes. (((((virtual group hug))))).
    My mother's big gripe was "Isn't it ILLEGAL"?
    Like, I was some back street hooker peddling my cookie for crack! C'mon...

  • I agree...Family may have concerns, but they have no right to say wheather it's wrong or right. They should remove the log from their eyes before trying to remove the splinter from yours.

  • Nobody in my family gambles but me (as far as I know). Well, except for my grandmother who likes to take group trips to the casinos now and then - and I doubt anybody in the family would even dare to try telling her to stop doing it. She needs to stay busy and occupied w/friends especially since her husband of seventy years or so passed. And I assume she's got the resources and discipline to stay within her means.

    As for me, I've wondered what they might say or think if they knew or I told them. Certainly the initial response would be disapproval even if I tried to explain the nature of my "gambling". I haven't even been doing it long and always try to make sure my risks are minimal. Actually, I try to make sure I have an advantage most of the time which is why I primarily stick with Blackjack. And I do have an advantage every time I play blackjack (as long as the house isn't surreptitously cheating somehow, which is unlikely). Of course, as anybody who's familiar w/advantage play in Blackjack knows, this doesn't doesn't mean I will always win in the short term. But in the long term I will, as long as I can stay at it long enough. And I do win more than I lose and expect that to continue. Still, I doubt there would be much understanding here unless I get to the point where I'm doling out loads of cash to back it up.  wink

    I do worry that I'll bump into my grandmother one of these days at the casino. That's gonna be hard to explain away.

  • I was going to post the same question sort of but decided against it, so I'm glad you posted.  Dh and I just got back from Vegas yesterday.  We spent several thousand dollars.  Of OUR money.  Plus $500 for a sitter.  We had to tell his relatives that we were doing everything with coupons, deep discounts, B1G1, and lots of sight seeing because of the backlash we know we would hear.  My dh won't tell his dad that he likes slots more than anything, because his dad is hardcore tables player who thinks they are junk.  While we did do alot of sightseeing- we mostly gambled.  My dh gets upset if I gamble without him, not if I gamble.  We don't tell his family what we do, if we go to a local casino we just say we went to dinner.  Now, dh thinks that online gambling is crap, but I see a possibility to win.  I haven't yet laugh_out_loud- not even earlier today when I decided to try out cherryred I think it was.  So I don't tell him that I have deposited much.  I do have a hard time with the morality of it, because I love it, I mean I LOVE it.  I would move to Vegas in a heartbeat if I could.  To get out of this NW rainy weather, but also because of the possibility and availability of doing one of the few things I actually enjoy.  I don't smoke, do drugs, rarely drink, I take care of my kids above myself so I am determined not to feel bad as long as I am not hurting them.  Other people's opinions really can make me feel bad though, so I prefer to keep quiet.

  • I went to a cafe yesterday and brought my laptop. I am currently out of town and thought it would be nice to go into town.

    Shockers of all shockers i could not get on LCB website! It was considered a gambling site and all gambling sites were forbidden. I was able to go through on LBB  side but could not post at the forum.

    Not only are family and friends against gambling so are public places that have wifi!

    Lips
  • My Fiance is all *Smiles* an shocked that I've been paid out, he's not complainin one bit as long as Im helpin to pay "HIS" bills....BUT....when Im sittin here enjoyin myself on MY computer and he's thinkin I should be doing something more productive....Well...I can just see it, he dont like it!! oh well, as others have posted ITS MY money!!  hehe

  • My family and friends are against my playing online. It's not because of gambling per se, but everybody says nobody wins at online casino. It's hard already winning at land base what more in online gambling which can be rigged because it just a software or an application that runs it, they continue to argue.

    All of them plays at the local casino here once a week. But frowns on my online gambling.

  • In many (perhaps) most people's minds "gambling" is in the same category as "drinking."  It is a word with lots of negativity.  I think the biggest reason for this is the addictive/ compulsion issues that come with it.  Most people know gamblers as being liars, borrowers of money which never get paid back, perhaps theft, and having a one track mind.

    All of this is true.  There are HUGE problems associated with gambling.  However, (for example) I have a buddy who loves golf.  He is always buying the latest club, goes on 3-day weekend golf trips and plays once or twice a week.  He spends $1000s a year on golf.  Yet, this use of money is acceptable to society.  Someone who spent the same money and time on gambling would be considered a "problem."

  • at least I have only my girlfriend (which means everything to me) and I've mentioned offensive my hobby from the beginning of our relationship.

    So far it works, as long as I'm doing my usual work also. God thanks for widescreen and multitasking. On the one hand I#m gambling and on the other hand I#m earning the money to do so at the same time...

    To be honest, I'm spending actual roundabout 25% of my earnings in online-gambling (Poker & Slots). Gr###########rr, I think I should win big one time to fullfill the quest. I mean, somewhere by somebody winnings are made or I'm caught in a mind-trap not realizing what's fiction and what's real...!?!

    Gotta hit some tables now...

  • As always, you bring up a really good point Doc.  Is alcohol really bad? No, it can actually be beneficial in moderate quantities. Drugs? No, they are needed to aid in pain management, psychiatric issue, etc Gambling? No, its entertainment and can release the feel good chemicals in your brain. The problem is that the abuse of alcohol, drugs, gambling has devestated families and as a result all are frowned upon.
    So now why is it that I've never heard of an avid golfer ending up on a street corner begging for change? hmmmm

  • So now why is it that I've never heard of an avid golfer ending up on a street corner begging for change? hmmmm


    I'm sure they're out there. You just haven't come across one or heard of one. From now on, whenever someone on the streets asks you for a little change, you just ask 'em: "...you ever play golf?" - with a little hesitation before you give 'em the change. One of these days your liable to come across a real sob story that will open your eyes.

  • John Daly sometimes he peddle his things for souvenir at tournaments he's not in. Press had a field day with John trying to mock him instead of keeping faith he can overcome difficulties. I used to watch him on TV, I like his style of approach shots while people always look for his big monstrous drives. He is adept and control for a strong hitter when it comes to those 150 yards and below.

    I'm sure they're out there. You just haven't come across one or heard of one. From now on, whenever someone on the streets asks you for a little change, you just ask 'em: "...you ever play golf?" - with a little hesitation before you give 'em the change. One of these days your liable to come across a real sob story that will open your eyes.


  • My grandmother is a lil on the old side, so I live with her to help her as much as I possibly can, and she completly despises gambling. But she hates computers too so im kinda in a lose lose situation. I just tell her, look this gives me something to do. Who knows, maybe one day I can get her ta spin a slot..  smiley:)

  • Ok, my family that lives in Vegas found out I gambled when I hit a Random JP at COOLCAT lmao I told everyone. I was new to the online gaming scene, and I didnt know any better. Low and Behold I didnt get paid, and I had to tell everyone that...Now they all think online gambling is a scam, based on that one experience. So they don't want me to gamble online, but mind you I come from Las Vegas where most of my family is now, and my grandmother and aunt are BINGO FREAKS! lmao

    Last night while watching TV my husband and I were talking about gambling online. He doesnt believe that an online casino will actually pay you. I told him about players on here that have gotten paid, but he thinks they work for the casinos LMAO...sooo he really doesnt like me gambling, but there is more to the story why he doesnt like it..

    There was a time where I was way more into it than I am now. I dont play anymore unless I can afford to do so, or a free chip comes my way. In the past I would play play play all day long, and with 5 kids, I had to set my priorities in place. I would hunt for free chips, spend all my extra money, or even money I couldn't afford to lose. I dont do that anymore. So I guess he doesnt mind if I play every once in a while...

  • about 3 years ago , I threw my almost new computer off the back porch, then sprayed it down with the water hose to make sure it was dead.  A year later, I bought another one.  This time around I've set limits and pretty much stayed within those limits.  I come from a family of gamblers, was shuffling cards by the time i was 3.  My family does talk behind my back about it (pot calling kettle black).  So now I keep it private wins and loses.

  • Well.. i have been goin through a little of this scenario...

    One after another family members saying this.. "I'm going to be 21 in a few and the first thing i want to do is.. i want YOU to take me GAMBLING!!!"
                   
                                grin  lips_sealed  huh  lips_sealed  grin

    My gosh i guess, whats done in the family stays in the family... forever..

                           

  • No one in my family approve gambling... sad but they try hard to understand and let me having my way...my teenage daughter told me several time that she wish me quit gambling but if that is what I enjoy, she understands...as long as I don't go crazy wasting money...
    None of my family, mother or uncles and aunties know about my online gambling and if they do, I know that I will be in deep trouble...
    I am the type of person who is in everywhere and do everything at the same time so no one, so far suspects me if I even have a time to play...ha ha ha!!! tongue

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