I Say Go Ahead And Cry

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    Last post ago about 6 years by jaybean
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        Hiya Guys and Dolls,

        Does the man in your life cry? Or does he come from the school of thought that real men don't cry. I have known a few men in my life that think crying is a sign of weakness. I never quite understood that mentality.

        I think a man who cries is confident in who he is and is not afraid to show his emotions. But when a man cries it is a powerful thing.

        I cry at the drop of a hat. I am very sentimental that way. I know a few females too that don't cry too often. I cry when i am happy and of course when sad. Even sometimes when i get really mad. But i hate myself for crying when i get mad cuz i don't want to!!

        Would you consider yourself a crier or not?

        Lips
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          Mighty! Member
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        I cry often, and get over it fairly quickly.  It's a release.
        Jake cries often, and gets over it immediately.  It's a ruse.
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          Super Hero
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        Men are not supposed to cry.  It shows weakness (at least that's how it's perceived imo).  Men are supposed to be pilliars of strength.  Stoic, unrelenting, fearless.  Look at the popular programming of how "respected" men are presented: Dirty Harry, Father Knows Best, John Wayne, "The Fonz" to name a few.

        Moreover, these "stones of granite" are revered as sex symbols.  There's a quote in the movie "Love Actually"...."no one's going to (have sex) with you if you cry all the time."
        The images are hard to overcome.
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        Valid points there Joseph and very true. I think no matter how much women try to portray themselves as equals to men, some still look for a "protector" type man.Dating back to cavemen days. The man who was the best hunter was the man that women wanted.

        Lips
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        Believe it or not, there are schools for men to learn to act that way and one school I think the top prize is a trip to the Playboy mansion.
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        That would be enough to make any man not cry! Maybe they need some of those incentives for the girlies like a trip to .....um they don't have a mansion where there is all men do they!
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          Mighty! Member
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        they probably do and they probably don't let girls in!
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        that's all i ever do lately...just started therapy
        hehe....
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        Well i a watching idol now and there is the cutest little boy who just cried so hard cuz he made it..........sigh i had to cry with him!

        Lips
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        oh i just saw that....i hate when they cry when they don't get on, then i almost cry.
        hey...i cried on oprah today...hehe
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        i freaking almost cried when i was playing mayan queen and the pyramids lined up in the center position on lines 1, 2, 4 and 5 and the mayan queen went past ONE SYMBOL on the center row!!  that crazy queen always makes me want to cry but i think she is a hotty hahahaah  go figure
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        I'll put on my old Psychologist's hat.  If you HOLD BACK crying, you'll end up in trouble.  Not good.  Don't recommend!
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        ya doc..you are definately right.  i clouded my mind with my
        indiscretions ...drinking, drugs, etc, now too much gambliing
        its all the same.  but when you stop it all, and give it a good look,
        then all those crys that were locked away come out...
        i never realized how much crap i blotted out with my gambling, until
        these last couple months since i have stopped....it is like being an
        exposed nerve....
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        Joseph Kennedy wrote:

        Men are not supposed to cry.  It shows weakness (at least that's how it's perceived imo).  Men are supposed to be pilliars of strength.  Stoic, unrelenting, fearless.  Look at the popular programming of how "respected" men are presented: Dirty Harry, Father Knows Best, John Wayne, "The Fonz" to name a few.

        Moreover, these "stones of granite" are revered as sex symbols.  There's a quote in the movie "Love Actually"...."no one's going to (have sex) with you if you cry all the time."
        The images are hard to overcome.


        That's wonderful input from a man's view Joseph.  I learned a lot from your post and think I understand my husband more now.  He will only cry if it has become so so awful whatever that may be and when he does it tears me apart.  Just seeing him cry makes me cry also.  It is pretty intense when he does finally cry.  You might call it a breakdown.  A man crying can be a very powerful thing.
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        jaybean wrote:

        that's all i ever do lately...just started therapy
        hehe....


        I also started therapy about 6 months ago.  I still do not cry very often at all.  And after reading your other post I know it is because I am still gambling.  My doctor said for me to stop the gambling so we can see what is really making me sad.  I don't want to stop...even though I know I should, many times over.  I was very very luck the last two months of 2010.  So when you are on a losing streak it makes you keep playing in hopes of the past luck to return.  My doctor even said for my husband to take the modem to work with him and plug it back up when he gets home.  I told my husband what she said and he said he isn't stupid.....lol and that I would be XXXXX if he did that.  He is right....I would survive and could live without it but either I don't want to or I am replacing it with something that is missing or not right.   I do feel better since I have started counceling but I have not had a major crying episode and I rarely cry at all unless it has to do with my gambling.  I'm going to continue my therapy and I hope you do also Jaybean.  It seems like you are on a very healthy road.  I hope to really have a breakthrough soon like you have.  It looks like you release so much when it happens.  I just wanted to tell you I am proud of you and I wish you continued success on this amazing road of recovery.

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