Keeping your Promise.

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    Last post ago over 6 years by BIGLEAN
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        Hiya Members,

        How far would you go to keep your promise to a good friend? What would you do in a hypothetical situation like this....

        A friend confides to you that he has committed a particular crime and you promise never to tell. Discovering that an innocent person has been accused of the crime, you plead with your friend to give himself up. He refuses and reminds you of your promise. What should you do?

        In general, under what conditions should promises be broken?

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        Imagin.ation

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        This is a toughy, and to be honest even though they are a friend, i would not of promised, the reason is i make promises i know i can keep, i learned that lesson long ago.

        But if it so happened that i did, i would keep the promise unless i was forced under say court of law, also hoping that that friend realizes that it's tearing my heart out to do it, but if that is never the case, i'd have to hope that my friend does the right thing to confess and set the innocent free, continue with my pleading, though i know he did it, it was not i who commited the crime, i am only a person he told. This friend would have to do the right thing, thats what it boils down to.
        Lastly i would break off the friendship if he does not clear the innocent person.

        You can probably feel like you have commited the crime yourself, the guilt of knowing who really did it.
        The betrayal your friend will feel in not having your trust and confidement if you tell, for now he has to suffer for what he did.
        You are making a choice between your friend and the innocent person, as a friend who made a promise you want to keep them protected, but as a person who has a conscience you want to let the innocent man free.
        You may feel like a let down, not able to keep the promise and feel shamed by that, making a choice between the right thing and a promise.. which is which..
        Many many things your mind will go through.. but you did.. you did make a promise..
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        chillymellow

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        At the point where my friend let someone else take the rap they cease being my friend so deal's off.
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        MommyMachine

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        If that person is willing to sit there and watch someone innocent pay for the crime that they commited, they aren't really an honest person.

        Even though I made a promise, I also make a promise everyday to myself to do what's right in whatever it is that I do. I understand friendship is a strong thing, however, would your conscience (sp?) allow you to be ok with that? I know mine wouldn't, so I would have to do what my heart felt was right.

        I wouldn't want to lose a friend, but hopefully, if they are a GOOD friend, they would understand.

        Wanting to hide something you did is one thing, however letting someone innocent take the rap, is a different thing entirely.


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        genenco

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        I have learned that sometimes making promises can end up costing me some $ So, I RARELY promise anything and if someone was to ask me to keep a secret, I'd say "As long as it doesn't involve murder or little children, I can"

        If they told me afterward that what they did was one of those things, I would feel free to alert the police/justice.

        But I would tell them to come forward and suck it up should another be accused.
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        allgood2010

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        I'd be mad that my so called friend put me in that situation by telling me what they did.  Any friend of mine would know that bad secrets or hiding things don't sit well with me.  Especially once I knew someone else took the fall it would really upset me.  The questions states we promised not to tell on them..I would be the little birdy that told and then be honest with my friend that I told on them.
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        I would keep my promise even though i wouldn't like what the friend had done. Where it would get complicated is if a innocent person was accused of the crime and did the time.

        If i break the promise then i will convict my friend. Then there is guilt. If i watch as someone innocent went to jail for it then i would feel guilty too. I think our first instinct would be to break the promise because in reality it is the moral thing to do. But if it is a very very good friend, someone you consider as family........that is tough to stand by as we watch them put on their stripe uniform.

        In the end i think it would probably ruin our friendship if i said nothing. I would hope that the person would have morals too and turn themselves in.

        I did have a friend who told me something they had done and made me promise not to tell. Although an innocent person didn't take the rap for it, it slowly chipped away at me for what my friend did.  I eventually drifted from this person because it was against everything i believe in and everything i believed in this friend.


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        I'd be afraid they would come after me and kill me or hurt my family if they knew I told... so I would end the friendship right off the bat, and then leave an anonymous tip that might possibly include their address, name, phone number and how I know LLL
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        BIGLEAN

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        I am a woman of my word and if I promise I keep it. However an innocent person losing their life locked up for something they didn't do...I would have to compromise my friendship at that point! It would hurt me bad, but it would hurt me more to know that I am letting an innocent person take the blame and be punished for something they didn't do!

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