Online Chemistry/ Laws of Attraction

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    acgofer

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          acgofer

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            This is a topic I got into with a friend.

            Is pure online chemistry between two strangers possible?

            * These 2 strangers have never met, never heard each other's voices, never smelled the other's pheromones. All they've got is a photo and a keyboard, like a dating site, or an instant messenger service.

            My opinion......absolutely 100% it is possible.

            I'm curious to hear what the majority of your opinions on this subject is. Has anyone ever felt that "spark" stricly from an online correspondance with someone? Or do you think it's all non-sense?

            Here is a detailed definition of Romantic Chemistry, I found on a web site:

            "Romantic Chemistry" Detailed Definition
            In psychology, the word "chemistry" is used when referencing natural mutual rapport between two or more people. When two people have "chemistry" they effortlessly feel a natural connection with each other, even if they've just met. The term "romantic chemistry" refers to a natural mutual romantic attraction between two people which results from a mixture of physical attraction and natural mutual personality-based rapport.

            A relationship must meet three criteria to qualify as having true "romantic chemistry":

            * Mutual - One sided attraction is simply "attraction", "infatuation" or maybe even "lust." Once any of those terms become what both sides are feeling for each other then it is mutual and satisfies one requirement of "romantic chemistry."

            * Effortless - "Learning to love someone" isn't generally referred to as "romantic chemistry." The whole idea is that there's an effortless connection, a natural rapport between people which earns the special moniker. Two people who feel like old friends, even though they've just met, qualify as feeling this natural, effortless connection.

            * Sexual - "Romantic chemistry" without sexual attraction is merely "chemistry" or friendship. When two people feel "romantic chemistry" they not only feel naturally like old friends, but they also feel a sexual attraction to each other. The term "sexual chemistry" is used when referring only to the sexual component of romantic chemistry.




            So, what are your thoughts?
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            Hi ac,

            Without a shadow of a doubt! I am absolutely certain its possible. Talking to someone online does not give you the "real time" experience of touching the person that is so vital in any relationship. But there is definite qualities to online relationships that might not be quite as prevalent in real time.

            The reason i say this, is the written word is very powerful. Chatting with someone online forces communication much more than in person where there is outside distractions and pauses in conversation. Online chatting does not allow lagging!!! Lag in a convo on line and your quickly reprimanded for it!

            Also i think there is a tendency to speak more candidly about personal feelings and events in your life online because there is that shield of protection between the two of you. I think that online dating moves alot quicker than in person dating because we tend to open up more. Feelings are more easily expressed, where as in person we might tend to hold back and play the "stand off" game.

            There is restrictions in online dating, therefore there is no time nor room for holding back or playing games. I think when you finally do get to meet them in person it is more powerful than any first time meeting in person.

            Now, im speaking from a point of view of genuine honest relationships here. There is of course online relationships that in the end are not sincere nor real at all.

            All i can say in my personal experience........i have made some of the best friends of my life. I have shared more.....opened up more than i have with many in real time.

            Maybe im a dreamer.......maybe i am too trusting at times....but all i do know is those i have developed close ties with....its real....its very real.

            Lips
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            dirkemans

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            i would say a lot, but it has all been said by the two of you ^^
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            max1mike

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            i met my wife online...:D
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            acgofer

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              ***Lips***
              I don't think I could have said it better!!! Well written. About 10 years ago, I met someone online- total undeniable attraction. He was a tall, built, UFC fighter, gorgeous. I lived in NJ at the time, he- in Mississippi.
              We chatted online for 3-4 months, then on the phone maybe 5 times... and I was going to drive to TX to visit family. Instead, I flew into Biloxi, MS,  got off the plane sooooooo nervous yet excited, and the moment our eyes met, it was the biggest "BAM!" - like a movie, he grabbed me, hugged, picked up and twirled around. It was so surreal. I stayed with him for 3 straight days, rented a car to drive to TX, Cried every mile of the way, missing him. Then guess what happened?..............................................
              He moved to Ireland 3 days later. He was married.
              Although I do believe online chemistry is real, and entirely possible, that heartbreaking experience helped keep my guard up for years after.

              So, although it doesn't always work out, sometimes it's worth the risk.

              Chemistry is very powerful  & can have a magical affect on your emotions.
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              dirkemans

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              i had  a sexual affair once, through a pokerroom chat (the old interpoker, where it was just play money)
              turned out we were both in holland, and we fell in love with eachothers picture/avatar ( both cute kittens:P)
              so i started fooliing around, and we actually had  a great, then deep, and later seually tainted conversation...
              since i was  about to take off to switzerland for  a season-job, i felt the urge to meet her,
              she came driving all across the country to meet up o.o
              (in holland thats  max 3 hours drive )
              RAAAAAWR that was a great long night.
              and guess what?
              she had  a long relationship too!
              lol, not that i really did mind, but she did feel guilty afterwards, later, she told me she had fessed up, and that they were still together...


              also look at this forum!
              i feel like i have made some friends already, so yes its sooooooooo possible, denying that would be ...
              silly?
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              debo2759

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              I think it is possible... Where oh WHERE are you Mr. Right??????LOL
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              acgofer

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                debo2759 wrote:

                I think it is possible... Where oh WHERE are you Mr. Right??????LOL


                debo....
                looking at your avatar, my chemistry senses tell me your mister right has an avatar of a nice little sailboat. lol.
                You'll find Mr. Right....but don't waste your life waiting, give Mr. Right Now a chance!
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                Shelli

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                It is possible, but unfortunately a lot of people on line are living a lie.  Since my first "on line" friendships developed from playing spades on yahoo almost 10 years ago and everyone there seems to lie.  At one point I had over 500 people on my messenger and I probably caught 80% in their own little lies. lol  

                I do have 11 very good friends that I met through spades and 6 of them I have met in person.  One of them is my best friend Olivia.  She lives in Indiana and I live in California.  We talk everyday, sometimes more than once.  She has flown out here 4 times and we met up in Vegas last year.  I love her and would do ANYTHING for her.

                My friend Jamie met her man on line about 2 years ago.  She was in the Virgin Islands and Howie was in Los Angeles.  They both had significant others and new it, but when we were playing spades they were "a couple" like it was an entire different world.  They finally met in person about 6 months ago and a few weeks after they "met" she packed her stuff, her 2 sons and met him in Tennessee (I think) and they are SO HAPPY it almost makes me sick!! hehe

                Kind of odd that when I started this reply it was about the fact that everyone on line lies, be careful, you can't trust anyone, blah blah blah.......

                But I just realized I would gladly listen to thousands of lies if it meant I might find someone like Olivia. ;-)


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                dirkemans

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                great stories so far^^
                seems "on-life" has its pro's 
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                debo2759

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                Acgofer- You are absolutely right!! Now-where is that sailboat?-LMAO
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                satansmuff

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                I mixed feelings on this....yes it's possible to connect, but is that connect real? I've recently met a few people from online and the ones I have met in the last few weeks, well how do I say this....FAKE!! Some people are just soo easy to talk to online , but then you meet in person and it's a whole night of akward silence....what happened to the chatter box!?? Or you can get along great online, then you meet and you can't agree on a single thing and spend the whole night arguing with a complete stranger! BUT, on the other hand I have met some wonderful people online too.......
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                debo2759

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                I am telling everyone from experiance- Do NOT trust anyone you cannot see face to face on a date!
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                acgofer

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                  ok....blonde question.....

                  How can you not see them on a date?



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                  dirkemans

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                  acgofer wrote:

                  ok....blonde question.....

                  How can you not see them on a date?






                  hahaha!

                  maybe if your really blind?
                  or if the guy/girl shows up in mardigrass outfit?

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