The definition of a Gunnylab vacation

FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY, NOT MEANT TO PISS ANYONE OFF.

At 8 pm I have to meet my sister to pick up her shitzpoo because for the next 9 days I am on dogsitting duties due to vacation.  Picture this for the next 9 days in my 24" by 13" living room.

1. Due to 90 degree plus weather and my central airconditioning doesnt hardly cool the top level of my quad level house, I have to sleep 1 level down from there on the couch in the living room.

2. Lottie Lab, my newly rescued black lab refuses to do steps in the house and will not go into the kitchen which is off the living room on the same level.  So, Lottie Lab when not taken outside lives 24/7 in the living room on one end of the couch or the loveseat.

3. Cledus and Lester, they are my 2 guinnea pigs that live and run free in the living room.  Their plastic baby swimming pool which houses their food, water and blankie is at one end. They run back and forth from under the couch to their area.

4. The shitpoo follows me everywhere I amand I am in the living room about 22 hours a day.  Hershel the shitzpoo sleeps on top of a couch cushion and towel on Lottie Lab's side of the couch.

In conclusion in a 23 by 14 area then subtract the mini pigs area will be 1 terrible online gambler, 1 extra large dog, 1 small, mean dog and 2 guinnea pigs. 

Two weeks ago I had the shitzpoo for 30 hours and it was a disaster.  Lottie Lab kept leaving her feet and lounging at theshitzpoo causing the shitzpoo to scream at the top of his lungs.  Lottie Lab does this all the time to the mini pigs to show whose boss.  This isnt a regular little dog I am watching.helooks for things to put in his mouth and dare u to try and take it away from him.  My mother, sister and brother in law have scars on their hands where this little shitzpoo has bitten them for trying to get stuff out of his mouth.  I am smarter than that.  After I almost lost a finger a few times I started wearing the oven mitts when dealing with a paper towel, sock or underwear in his mouth.  I tell him go ahead ahole u bite the oven mitts u r going flying across the room.  Lastly, Lottie Lab got po'ed when she couldnt sleep on her side of the couch because the shitzpoo's cushion and towel was in the way.  Add all this andbeing the only one to take care of my 85 and 88 year old mother and father's needs I am accepting donations of prozac.

Sorry... no prozac donations but I do have Percocet leftover from an injury.

Oh my..... You do have your hands full.

I 'd at the guinnea pig part.  My son has 2 who live in the family room (in their cage), cuz, hey, we don't want them to be lonely and I let them run around the family room a few times a week.   I'm on my hands and knees with the vacuum attatchment sucking up little turds from under a table (the only place they poo when out)

LOL

Mine have been running loose 24/7 for 3 1/2 years but I have them potty trained.  Under their swimming pool and under the couch is plastic then newspaper on top then a sheet on top of that.  All I have to do is empty the sheets in the garbage can and wash them.  In fact today I did 2 loads of piggy sheets and after this post I have to kick theit butts out of their swimming pool to change newspaper and the sheet.  My pigs are brothers that have been together since birth.  Cledus is gay and Lester is an obsessive compulsive eater.  There names were suppose to be Lester and Molester but I took alot of flack over the name Molester so I named him Cledus after an online friends nickname I gave her.

Too Cute. My son has sisters... Mystery and Ed.

I love your post Gunnylab.  The bit that made me chuckle the most was this:

3. Cledus and Lester, they are my 2 guinnea pigs that live and run free in the living room.  Their plastic baby swimming pool which houses their food, water and blankie is at one end. They run back and forth from under the couch to their area.

That just sounds so cute.  How did you manage to house train them? 

"Cledus is gay and Lester is an obsessive compulsive eater. "   Incredible. 

Sounds as though you can't leave anything laying around with the shitzpoo gobbling everything up.  Aren't you concerned the shitzpoo might eat the guinea pigs?  You really have your hands full and I wish you peace and tranquility for the next 9 days.

blue

Admin note:

ive altered the thread's title. Please note people all over the world visit this forum and what may seem to one as funny it can be taken as derogatory to others.

thank you for your understanding

Zuga

Thats fine Zuga, I wasnt looking for trouble. 

Blue, I have to be the only single 55 year old male that has guinnea pigs.  U will love how I ended up getting involved having them as pets.  In 2003 my online honey moved 670 miles to move in with me.  At the time I was 46 and she was 34.  We were at a family dinner at my sister's house and my niece was watching her friend's guinnea pig.  On the way home Robin told me she needed to get us a guinnea pig.  The next nite I took her to get herself one.  They all looked ugly and had boring colors except one.  He was part black, part brown and a white spot on his forehead.  We agreed on him and the lady lifted him out of the cage and handed him to Robin.  We laughed because the poor thing was shaking like crazy.  We bought him with a cage and accessories.  Robin said we needed a name.  I named him Pervis after a 1980's basketball player named Pervis "never nervous" Ellison.  We had always nervous Pervis.  Robin then bought him a baby plastic swimming pool hence whats still in my living room.  Robin moved out 4 months later and left me Pervis.  At 47 I had no use for a female that drank too much boubon, got meaner than hell and was a nympho.  She is married now and lives 2 blocks from me but I never run into her or communicate with her.  While I was at work Pervis learned how to climb out of the swimming pool so I gave up and sawed a door out of the pool so he could go in and out of it.  Pervis idolized my black lab and followed him everywhere.  When my lab ate dog food Pervis ate dog food.  When my lab drank water Pervis drank water out of the water bowl.  When my lab slept on the carpet, Pervis curled up and slept against him.  They became inseparatable.  I had to have my lab put to sleep at 17 years old.  At the end i thought my lab had mange but here pervis was pulling his fur out and eating it.  Pervis disappeared for 4 days when my lab was gone then had trouble adjusting to my retarded beagle.  Pervis died 8 months later.  I found him dead inside the beagle's blanket at 6 years old.  In his 5 1/2 years of running free Pervis ate part of the drapes, the fabric off the back of the loveseat, countless electical cords and god knows what else.  I cant tell u why but I cried for 2 days after I buried Pervis in the side yard.  I remembered an article in the local paper that a middle aged couple had a guinnea pig rescue shelter in their house.  Here they lived 5 minutes from me so I went over there to get a little piggy.  I walked in their house and my jaw dropped.  These guinnea pigs were 3 times the size Pervis was.  They brought out 1 at a time 10 different huge mini pigs.  I was ready to give up because none did anything for me when I heard one in the house let out a scream the whole neighborhood could hear.  I asked to see that one.  It turned out to be Cledus.  Well, after I said I would take who would be named Cledus the lady told me there was a problem.  I was then told he has a brother he has been with since birth and she wont separate them.  She then brought this huge guinnea pig that turned out to be later known as Lester.  I told her oh well I will take both of them.  Lester who was the throw in to the deal has turned out to be my buddy and Cledus who is the one I picked out well we have never bonded.  These 2 have not touched the furniture and not 1 electrical cord.  After I got past the problem of them going under the kitchen table when I went to bed and pooping there they are perfectly behaved and do their business in there 2 assigned places.  The only other problem I had was with lester that lasted a year.  If he didnt get lettuce when he wanted it he would sit in front of the fridge until he got it.  So 2 1/2  years ago I trained them if they want lettuce they had to stand in their assigned spots in front of their plastic swimming pool.  To this day they still line up with Lester on the left and Cledus on the right always on the same spot.  Only once they got their spots mixed up and the wrong pig was on the wrong side of the other.  It was so funny I set the lettuce down and they didnt move because they knew something was wrong.  I had to pick the lettuce up and tell them to line up again.  They got it right and when I put the lettuce down they ate it.

Oh I forgot, Cledus and Lester had a real problem adjusting to my beagle.  They avoided him for a month then they adjusted to him.  I cant tell u how many times my beagle growled at them but they just accepted the fact he was mentally not all there.  The shitzpoo hasnt been a problem with the pigs.  I have had the shitzpoo for vacations ever since Robin lived here so he was used to Pervis.  He doesnt even bother with these 2.  I did have a problem Wedneday morning for some reason.  I put lettuce down for Cledus and Lester and the shitzpoo pushed them out of the way then walked off with the lettuce in his mouth.  They stood there with a wtf look on their faces.  Finally, I am having a major problem with my newly rescued lab dealing with the pigs.  She keeps leaving her feet while lounging at them.  I am having trouble getting her to stop doing this.

What a great story gunnylab.  I'm amazed that guinea pigs can be trained at all.

Thanks for the story - it did make me smile.

blue

Ya know Gunny , I have to say .. firstly i hope you stayed decently cool today , and secondly i have two cats , and since my apartment buildings fire , am still at my mother's house,  and since there is no more room upstairs i am staying in a cold dark basement wiht my two cats , Tobi and Chloe ( 13 and 10 ) .They are my precious girls as i call them since i never had children. And well even though i am in a basement at the moment , waiting for rent prices which are ridiculous around this area for what is available , to fall,. i'd not know if i could leave my two girls in the basement alone without me all the time , it would bother me.

Timwilcob, sorry to hear about your apartment fire.  Thats scary with animals in there.  Glad u have internet service down in the basement.  Like u I never had children but it was my choice.  I am amazed in my dating career and marriage a baby accident didnt happen.  I am an animal lover not a people lover.  I refused to pass on the chemical depression gene I have from my mother's side of the family and the colon cancer gene I have from my father's side of the family.  It wouldnt be fair to any child.  I finally found what void was missing in my life since 2006 when I rescued this huge 3 year old female lab from a shelter.  I took her everywhere with me until this terrible heat wave hit.  Stick to animals they give unconditional love.  The only problem is their life span.