What Would Your Reaction Be?

Have you ever heard someone talking about you or someone close to you? This could be anything from looks, personality or heritage. Did you say anything or let it go?

How did you or would you react if you heard nasty things being said?

Have you froggy? What would you do? I can tell you exactly what I would do... actually what I did... It was like this: My son and his 1st wife called my work telephone and when I did not answer they left me a message.

The  basic message was, Hi Mom how're things, can we have money for the emergency of the week.

Then they thought they had hung up their speakerphone, but they had not, so I got a bit more of a message... As soon as they thought they had hung up I heard my daughter-in-law tell my son, "Well she's your mother... with her voice she should  be working at a 900 number (sex number)." And she went on complaining about me to my son while my message center recorded it all.

So, what did I do about this... I shook my head and laughed a bit... then I called their house and very quietly and calmly told them they should make sure their speakerphone had actually hung up when they thought it did. I said nothing more and just hung up the phone.

Well, they thought about and stewed on that for a while realizing what they had said after they "hung up" and then they called me. For a couple of days, I just let them leave messages. My D-I-L got more and more desperate to apologize.

Then I called them back and let her apologize... but, when she told me that she did not mean what she said, I told her that she did indeed mean exactly what she said, but that she did not mean for me to hear what she said. Then I dropped the subject altogether.

We never spoke of it again, but recently, some 20 years after the incident, she called me out of the blue to tell me how she really appreciated me, that I had always been a wonderful mother-in-law and grandmother... etc.

katt

Wow Kat thats amazing.  I never had to worry about any of this.  I never let anyone including my parents close to me.  Even though I was married for 10 years and lived with 2 other females I always kept a distance.  This is why the internet has been great for me.  Now all my friends are online.  I can chat and talk on the phone with them but theres the distance I need.  I have always loved animals not humans.

Well gunny you know what they say... "The more I get to know people, the better I like my dog!"

katt

Great story Katt.  At least your daughter in law didn't give up calling you to apologise (prob only to make herself feel better).

I'm glad she appreciates you now although that was one heck of an insult!  You are very forgiving Katt.

I've been spoken about a few times as a school girl but I just ignored it.  I'm not saying I didn't care because I did but I chose to ignore it.

blue

My nationality has been put down right to my face more times than I can count because people don't realize where my family is from. That's not a good feeling. I tell them straight out to knock it off.

Most recently I had a house guest that did it. I didn't have a chance to say anything. My husband swooped in and handled it. The guy ended up apologizing but what can you say? He made things worse by trying to explain himself.

We can feel however we like as ignorant as it may be but keep it to yourself. You never know who you might be talking to.

      I like the message of forgive but don't forget.  I also think it's really unhealthy to hold a grudge as it stifles any chance of moving past it.  I think you did the right thing katt.                     
        Froggy I think you did good by not sinking to your guest's level.  The old adage still holds up about  "if you can't say anything nice..."

let me tell ya for 33 years i have bent over backwards to be accepted by my spouses family, once they called me a whore and i heard it my husband dealt with it considering ya gotta earn that name. i was a different religion, sad here mormon is strong then catholic i was getting it from both sides. finally one day i had enough just about two weeks ago and i told them all to go to hell. they are ignorant of life since then they have tried to belly up to us i am  decent to them but after 33 years i dont forgive or forget anymore, i hate it , it makes me sad.  But there stupidity has run over into my grandchildrens lives so now  there is no going back

That's terrible that your grand kids have been exposed to that. I don't blame you for not forgiving. 33 years is a long time and I wouldn't be able to forget either. At least you've had your husband's support. I can't imagine what I would do if he just sad back and did nothing. I would be so hurt then I would do bodily harm 

I cant believe these stories, its so sad.  I dont know how anyone could have anything bad against a froggy and all other frogs.  Spazz, I take it u arent Morman or Catholic???  The religion thing always seems to be a problem.  My dead ex wife was born Catholic then became a Morman.  When we were married I called her my half ass morman wife.  She went to church, tons of their activities and wore her garments.  Get this, she enjoyed getting shit faced and drank two to three 2 liters of coke a day.  For those of u who dont know it booze and caffeine are 2 very big no no's with the Mormans.  Holidays were always very interesting.  My sister, parents and me are wandering ju's, my psycho wife was morman and my brother in law was catholic. 

Spazz, I just gotta say you are one strong and patient woman to put up with those people for 33 years! I would not have lasted 33 minutes! Glad you are finally free of their stupidity!
And froggy, I agree with the bodily harm thing! 

I will call for explanation. Reason! why he calls me nasty.
And then i will remove that reason from my personality.